MAD – A Personal Journey

by Lynn Carneson McGregor ⁽¹⁾

Mad stands for ‘Making a difference’.

An attempt to make a difference through Art

How does one make sense of one’s life and the cards of fortune one has been dealt? Writing a biography of my parents and family and creating a graphic exhibition about a difficult phase of our lives has forced me to think more deeply about my life and how I live it today.  

Most of us are living between two centuries and between a dying form of capitalism and new as yet unformed ways of living both globally and locally. For me personally, I live emotionally between two countries, South Africa and England. I find living in an in-between-time frightening, challenging and exciting.

Everyone comes from a difficult- to- understand past and has their own history which, in turn is difficult for the next generation to comprehend. What each of us learns hopefully adds to the evolution of the good in human nature so that our legacy is a better world.  

I am grateful to Joe Sinclair for Nurturing Potential as it provides an opportunity not only for sharing our thoughts and work, but also for opening up a dialogue. It may be too early to have answers. What is important to me is whether we are asking the right questions.  

A year ago I launched my exhibition called ‘Red in the Rainbow’ about what life was like in a repressive regime by inviting visitors to journey with me, my brother and sister and my parents who were anti-apartheid, anti-racist activists who paid for the courage to fight injustice. It was based on my biography, Red in the Rainbow, which was reviewed in an early edition of Nurturing Potential.  

For those who read, books work. There are many others, who respond more to visual images. I decided to create a multi-media interactive vivid work of art in the form of a walk-through exhibition. As I wanted people to feel what life was like in the past, I invited them to journey with my family through some of our toughest years during Apartheid. It is an interactive installation intended to inspire thinking about life today. One of the definitions I used in my book, ‘Learning Through Drama’, many years ago is that ‘art is the process and medium for exploring and expressing meaning.  

As a way of being more relevant today, I wrote the stories, designed the overall exhibition and selected the texts and images. A graphic designer was then asked to produce posters which looked more like graphic comics than fine art so that younger people could get more involved in the journey. 

The theme is about an exploration of values, beliefs and archetypes from the past as a way of reflecting on the present and the future. It describes what it is like to live in a repressive regime. The details are South African but the stories are similar for any oppressive regime. It is also about the triumph of the human spirit over adversity. Visitors have found that they have identified with different aspects of the journey and have gone away with renewed hope. This form of art is not fashionable at the moment, but is an exploration to get more people involved with the content. 

I have selected a few images from the exhibition and hope that they will speak for themselves.

When I re-read the vision my father had of the life he would like us to have, I realised that these values have deeply influenced me all my life. I ask myself – are they still relevant today? Are they attainable?

When I was sixteen, my mother was arrested without trial for over six months. She went on hunger strike and was very ill. My father was in hiding. I and my younger brother John and sister Ruth were split up although I tried hard to keep us together. It was devastating.

Children writing to Sarah in jail during the Emergency

 I am very happy but I would rather be with you – John aged 7

I think a lot about you – Ruth aged 5

Don’t cry too much – a little crying won’t do any harm- it will relieve the tension – Lynn 16

Things got worse. My father was arrested, tortured and kept in solitary confinement for thirteen months before spending nearly six years with other prisoners in Pretoria Central Prison. He never betrayed anyone but they broke his faith in himself but never his spirit. When I saw him in prison, he was very thin and had lost his teeth and much of his hearing. He could hardly walk. The Security Police would not let me hug him. It was heart-breaking.

Fred was arrested in 1967, tortured and kept in solitary confinement for 13 months

When my father was in solitary confinement for months, his cell was so small he just had a bed role and a sanitation bucket. When he was given a pencil and paper, he wrote over two hundred letters to us but we were only allowed to see two of them.

One by one we went into exile including my father when he was eventually released from prison. We felt displaced, very short of money and had to establish ourselves in an alien county. As part of an exiled community kept on campaigning for a free South Africa. Many British people supported the campaign. What moved me most was the feeling that other people were really concerned. How many really care about what is happening in similar countries today?

In 1991 we were told that although it was still dangerous, it was safe enough to go back to South Africa. The rest of my family went back. I followed many years later with huge enthusiasm and expectations. To return was the worst and best decision I have ever made

We took part in the first democratic elections in South Africa. I was elated. People of all colours were queuing, making friends talking to each other and celebrating. We were free to create a different and hopefully better country.
The exhibition ends in 1994 with the liberation of South Africa. We had achieved freedom.

However, after any journey, the end always starts another beginning

May the dialogue begin